“I couldn't live a week without a private library
- indeed, I'd part with all my furniture and squat and sleep on the floor
before I'd let go of the 1500 or so books I possess.” ― H.P. Lovecraft

Whistling In The Graveyard

Friday, October 01, 2004

So Jay and I have been playing Star Wars: Battlefront for like three straight days now, stopping only for food, a few hours sleep and to occasionally stop the bleeding from our eyes.

The game has it’s flaws, but it still kicks total ass.

In other news, Nate had an interesting altercation at the bodega today.

The dictionary definition of bodega is:

(1) Cellar, wine cellar, warehouse, or ship's hold. Casa Chuparrosa has three bodegas or 'cellars': The lady's bodega, man's bodega and gardener's bodega.

(2) A small Hispanic shop selling wine and groceries.

However, if you live in a hispanic nieghborhood, or you’ve seen Half Baked, you know that a bodega is actually a small store containing just enough in the way of groceries that most people don’t know that they’re really selling illegal substances.

Given that the bodega is just across the alley from my house (I could hit it with a rock from my back porch) it is sometimes a convenient source of food-like substances.

Since it was before noon and I’m the only one in the house with a car (before noon = sleeping) Nate made such a journey.

So he gets his provisions to find himself in line behind an elderly woman in the process of buying twelve cans of Pringles with unrolled pennies.

If you know Nate you already see where this could get messy.

After several coughs and throat-clearings (which for Nate is VERY polite) the woman behind the counter, who was till then busy dumping pennies into a counting/rolling tube, asked the older woman to wait a moment while she let Nate go through.

Remember when old ladies were nice?

Well aparently those fucking days are OVER.

The old bat freaks out. Aparently in her world everyone has time to wait on her ass. So she goes to the door and yells loudly to the person in the car across the street (we assume it’s the person that drove her there) that they were making her wait.

As Nate was only buying six bucks worth of stuff he was finished before her tyrade was over and then had to wait for her to get out of the door so he could leave.

This is what we have to deal with in my nieghborhood.

Rampant insanity.

Luckily, I’m the very model of sanity.

That reminds me, I need to get that dog whistle so I can start training the nieghbor’s dog to kill and eat them.

Speaking of my neighbors, I finally had to call the city police today on their account.

Seems they think it’s really cool to park their van out front of their house, turn the stereo up full blast and dance in the street like idiots.

These are mostly young kids, like under ten, who must have help from some adult. Likely the adult that installed the amplifier and subwoofers.

Why an amp and subwoofers in a fucking soccer-mom-van? Fucked if I know.

It’s bad enough when they park in front of their house, (which is next door, which is why they’re nieghbors) where the kids play top 40 pop crap, but tonight they decided to park right in front of my house and play obnoxiously loud rap music.

Don’t get me wrong, loud music has it’s place. I myself have a 120 watt amp and a pair of 15 inch digital subwoofers in my trunk. I use them primarily to piss off people talking on cellphones at red lights, but I do enjoy loud music.

However there’s only a handful of rap songs that don’t make me want to fucking puke and they didn’t pick one of them.

It was serriously rattling shit off my wall and I still felt like an old man yelling at kids to get off my lawn.

That’s one of the ways you know you’re old, when you begin to care what your lawn looks like. I must still be really young because mine looks like shit around the edges. The only reason we mow it at all is to avoid my other nieghbors calling my Mom and complaining.

Like my lawn is the reason local property values are in the shitter.

But alas, it was not to be. The van left before the police arrived.

I’ll get them next time.

Damn kids…


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