“I couldn't live a week without a private library
- indeed, I'd part with all my furniture and squat and sleep on the floor
before I'd let go of the 1500 or so books I possess.” ― H.P. Lovecraft

Whistling In The Graveyard

Friday, March 04, 2005

OK, so someone (Probably Rich) sent me this link.

Now the premise is kinda funny. If you don't wanna click the link (lazy bastards) here's the highlights:

Toby is the cutest litle bunny on the planet. Unfortunately, he will die on June 30th, 2005 if you don't help.

I am going to eat him. I am going to take Toby to a butcher to have him slaughter this cute bunny.

I don't want to eat Toby, he is my friend, and he has always been the most loving, adorable pet. However, God as my witness, I will devour this little guy unless I recieve $50,000 USD into my account from donations or purchase of merchandise.

Disgusting? Despicable? Hilarious? Yes, it is all of those things, but what's REALLY disgusting is that as of my typing this he's made $17,000 this way.

$17,000 for a rabbit that he supposedly found under his porch.

$17,000 for a rabbit that he's still gonna eat on June 30th if he doesn't get ANOTHER $33,000 FUCKING DOLLARS.

So I got to thinking, "How can I proffit from this?"

Well here's my plan.

You've heard me talk about my roommate Jay who, by all accounts, is a pretty cool guy. Well if I don't get $20 USD or a pizza delivered to my house (Large pepperoni and mushroom with extra cheese), by March 11th, 2005, then I'm going to kick Jay in the nuts.

Now, I don't want to kick Jay in the nuts, so send me money or a pizza or buy something on my goddamn store.

Only you can save Jay from what will surely be 10 to 20 minutes of extreme discomfort.

Some of you may be asking "Why Jay?" Well I thought about using Nate for this, but the way you make money on this scheme is you have to threaten something people don't want to see happen. The first few people I ran the idea by seemed more inclined to give me money TO kick Nate in the nuts and that kinda messes up the dynamics of this thing.

So act now! Save Jay's nuts!

Oh, on a side note, I submitted my site to the Weblog Review. I'll let you know when I get the results.


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