OK guys Issue #7 will hit the net sometime between now and the 15th, and this time I have a story that can almost be considered actual news! I can't wait till I get some journalistic integrity so I can sell out for some mad fucking cash...

So the weather here has resembled shit they talked about in Revelations for the last few days. In fact, it recently broke out into the scourge of cool car owners HAIL. Now I know what you’re thinking, yes, my car is fine. It’s still the finest hunk of steel to ever roll out of Michigan and the baddest thing 1975 had to offer. I, on the other hand, am displaying some actual hail-damage. This occurred while I was throwing down comforters over the car to protect it from said hail. I ran for the blankets when I realized that the car was just too large for my to block the hail with my body alone. I almost grabbed my Stormtrooper helmet to protect my head during the exercise, but there wasn’t time.

A few lumps on your head and a tingling sensation in your left side are small prices to pay for a bad-ass automobile.