“I couldn't live a week without a private library
- indeed, I'd part with all my furniture and squat and sleep on the floor
before I'd let go of the 1500 or so books I possess.” ― H.P. Lovecraft

Whistling In The Graveyard

Tuesday, May 07, 2013

So I've decided I'm going to start using this thing again, because since I stopped using it my writing has really suffered.  So I'm back motherfuckers!

By the way, I use a lot of foul language when I write here in the Graveyard, so now you know that.

Anyways, quite a bit has happened in the gulf of months since since I last posted here.  Not the least of which was getting my surgery done!  That went pretty well and I'll post more about it later, but first I'm gonna rant about what popped into my head and made me return here.

See, I've never seen a Harlem Shake video.

That's not a goddamn challenge you assholes!

I'm PROUD of the fact that I've never seen a Harlem Shake video.  Why am I posting this now that the craze has mostly died down?  For exactly that very goddamn reason!  I figure it's pretty safe to post about this now that the dance craze, as is the way of all dance crazes, has died a much deserved death.

I believe that we are at a point in our evolution where dance crazes have become a vestigial social construct that should be done away with.

Like appendixes.

Or wisdom teeth.

Or Kardashians.

Actually, I have seen ONE Harlem Shake video, but only because the person dancing fell into a bonfire.  So there was very little dancing, more being on fire.  This made me quite happy.  I'm convinced that's where dance crazes originated anyway.  One caveman caught fire and they all learned how to stop, drop and roll in harmony.

Warning: The preceding video featured really shitty dancing and a guy falling into a fire.  You're welcome.

"Why are you so down on dance crazes?"  I hear some of you whining already.  "They don't hurt anybody!"  Well let me tell you people, most of you are too young, but I remember what the Macarena did to this country!

Sometimes... late at night... I can still hear that goddamn song...

So yeah, fuck the Harlem Shake, fuck Harlem Shake videos and, what the hell, fuck everything else for that matter.

Feels good to be back!


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