“I couldn't live a week without a private library
- indeed, I'd part with all my furniture and squat and sleep on the floor
before I'd let go of the 1500 or so books I possess.” ― H.P. Lovecraft

Whistling In The Graveyard

Monday, February 09, 2004

I was watching E! a little while ago, Howard Stern's show, and I saw an ad for the Oscars red carpet show. It was, as allways, hosted by the gorgon that is Joan Rivers.

I think I've expressed my feelings on Joan Rivers and her halfwit daughter on more than one occasion. Something about stunning her with her own reflection and then beheading her. Anyways, I think she has now officially had more plastic surgery than Michael Jackson. Not that Jackson's surgeons are slacking off or anything, I think they're both having work done at the maximum possible limit, it's just that Rivers has been doing it longer because she's FUCKING OLD.

Old, and completely untalented in every way. To top that off she now looks like an impressionistic painter's interpretation of a tweyntysomething year old.

Yes, yes, we live in a culture obsessed with youth, yes, Hollywood is the worst example of this, yes, you have to have work done to be successful in the entertainment industry, but unless that surgeon stuffs a sense of humor and a less annoying voice in that skull as a part of the next face lift what's the fucking point? Who keeps thinking "Let's get Joan Rivers! She's current and relevant!".

Things like this are why I hate Hollywood producers.

On an interesting side note, the following commercial was for penis enlarging pills. The last thing I want to think of in conjunction with Joan River's drum-tightly stretched ass is my penis. Rivers is firmly on my list of women I would NOT have sex with. Her, the crazy woman across the street from us that yells incoherently at passers by and that creepy old woman on late night cable that talks about vibrators. That's all I can think of right now, but I can assure you there are others.

One last thought on Joan Rivers, you think there's a picture of her in the attic that's having plastic surgery UNDONE to it?

No that wasn't a reference to League Of Extrordinary Gentlemen. It's a reference to "The Picture Of Dorian Grey" by Oscar Wilde. It's called a book people. You'd do well to pick one up once in a while.

Speaking of which, if you had ANY intrest in the League of Extrordinary Gentlemen at all then you need to check out the comic book. It really is a whole lot better.

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