I've donated all of my worldly belongings to the church in keeping with my new vow of poverty (I'm currently at the seminary school library) and I hope to find myself in very short order spreading the glorious word of salvation through our lord Jesus Christ in some disease scarred, third-world country.
I'm afraid this will have to be my last post here since my new beliefs are now in total conflict with everything this blog stands for. I hope you'll all understand.
Ford W. Maverick
PS: Anyone that read this far and took that shit seriously despite the fact that you all know it's April 1st owes me a blowjob.
Contact me at firstname.lastname@example.org for directions to my place so you can pay up suckers!
A real post will follow soon, I promise!
But seriously, blowjob, get on that. You know who you are.